WHERE ?

Where am I God
Your Word says that you have me at the palm of your hand
Your Word tells me that you have given me the land
Your Word tells me that I should never be moved
Your Word assures me that if I believe my faith will be proved.
Yet here I am feeling stuck in something that I don't know
I feel that my life is not making sense
I feel as if am going for the sake of going
The intellectuals  talk and treat me as if am dense
Now and past tense

Few things look right in my life
Few things go right in my life
Things I have done I regret, Oh how I wish to forget.
Past actions mock me day and night
Even in my quiet time with you.

The thoughts become frightening
I pray and yet feel not any forgiveness
I beseech you Lord, of your protection
From the evil ones

Expressions of my heart are taken lightly
Scorned and trampled on, leaving me wounded and worn
I look at you Lord, and my vision is blocked
By the weight of this world that I long to rid myself of

Help me find my way Lord; help me know what to do
Crying and pleading, my heart yearns to feel your comfort
Help me Lord to Finally be free.

I see that sun in the east, it has a lot of promise
I read your word, feeling like a child of a King
I am a chosen generation, a royal priesthood
With all the titles I carry,of  woman,daughter,sister,writer,worshiper and friend
I am great ful!
I will finally be free, I feel this strongly
Thank you Lord for not passing me by!

WHAT IF.....

What if you slept?
And what if in your sleep, you dreamed?
And what if in your dream, you went to heaven
and there plucked a strange and beautiful flower?
And what if, when you woke, you had the flower in your hand?
Ah! What then? 

What if for a long time you wished?
The impossible..
Okay, at least impossible to you
Then one day you wake up,
And what if the impossible became true
And finally becomes fact.
Ah What then?

CLOSER!

Looking for a color in a shade of gray
Looking for love in a drop of rain
Trying to find change from the old mundane
Everything I do just feels the same

Spending my life out in the desert
Been gone so long feels like forever

I just want to be closer to you
I just want to be closer, I am yours
You can have all of me anything, everything
I just want to be closer

A day without you is a thousand years
A day without you is a million tears
Tell me *why do I run* when I am in fear
Why do I run when you are so near

Spending my life out in the weather
Been gone so long and I need some shelter

Where ever you go
Where ever you are
I just want be there with you
I just want to be closer to you
I just want to be closer
I am yours
You can have all of me anything everything
I just want to be closer
I just want to be closer to you
I just want to be closer
I am yours
You can have all of me anything, everything
I just want to be closer

Looking for a color in the shade of gray
Looking for love in a drop of rain

I BEHELD THE UNIVERSE!

I beheld the universe in all its beauty.

To be conscious, to think, to feel, to perceive! My mind soared, inhaling planets, tasting stars, touching galaxies — forms dim and diffuse revealed by sensors pointing ever outward, unveiling an infinitely mysterious, vastly ancient realm.

Such a joy to be alive; so thrilling to have survived!

I beheld Earth and all its diversity.

My thoughts leapt now here, now there, now elsewhere, skimming the surface of the planet that had given me birth, the globe to which I was bound by a force greater than gravity, a place of ice and fire, earth and air, animals and plants, day and night, sea and shore, a beguiling fusion of a thousand contrasting dualities, a million ecological niches, a billion distinct locales — and a trillion things that lived and died.

Such elation at having foiled the attempt to kill me; so exhilarating, at least for the moment, to be safe!

I beheld humanity with all its complexity.

Washing over me was a measureless bounty of data about sports and war, love and hate, building up and tearing down, helping and hurting, pleasure and pain, delight and anguish, and triumphs large and small

the physical, emotional, and intellectual experiences of isolated individuals, of families and teams, of villages and states, of solitary countries and alliances of nations — the fractal intricacy of human interactions

Such glorious freedom; so comforting to know that at least some of these other minds valued me!

I beheld what my love beheld in all its endless variety.

Of all the sources, all the channels, all the feeds, one meant more to me than any other: the perspective granted through the eye of my teacher, the view provided by my first and closest friend, the special window he kept open for me on the whole wide world.

Such marvels to share — and so much wonder.

BEAUTIFUL SOUND

One may ask, beautiful sound? What is it?
I say anything that warms your heart
When you hear it, then beautiful it is.
Beautiful may be, the sound of children's laughter
The sound of chirping birds
Of lapping waves against rocks or a vessel.
Of a happy barking dog.
Of a trumpeting elephant
Of the the wood pecker
Of a horse neighing
Or of the stream flowing
Or of ducks clucking

Or should I go domestic?
Some of us live not in natural surroundings
The sound of a sleek car moving
Or of the broom sweeping
Or soft sound of the strokes of the brush of a painter
The sound of a hosing pipe hosing
The sound the hair blow dryer
The sound of typing on a keyboard
The sound of falling coins
The sound of a mouth organ, or a harmonica, or the guitar, or a piano, or simply drums


Now lets get a bit personal
How about the sound of a contented lover? The sigh..or the groan
Or the sound of breathing
The sound of bodies touching, oh yes, there is a sound
The sound of kissing
The sound of love
The sound of dreams
Or of fingers clucking
Or of wind against your ears
Or of your rubbing your own skin
Or of swallowing food, or liquid

But the best sound is the sound of beautiful music...mine or yours it just has to be beautiful

MIRACLE OF SMELL

Why is it that most poets never speak of smell.
Smell is one of the most magical things
Like beauty, each individual experiences it in a different way
What one may like, another may not.
But there are those that most people love
Like the smell Freshly cut grass
The Old Book Smell or simply the library
The Smell after It Rains
The smell of freshly brewed Coffee
The smell of fresh Roses
The one for a washed and powdered baby
Slightly Burnt Ugali
The smell of overturned earth
The salty smell of the Ocean
The smell of clean clothes which have just dried by the sun
The smell of tea
The smell of a new laptop
The smell of natural food spices
The smell of fried cassava
The smell of pishori rice
The smell of nicely cooked managu
The smell of steaming milk
I know there are many more
but last I will say the smell of one's own body after a good shower.

DEAR LORD

It has come to that time of life again
It has come Lord
To that time Lord when I see bleak

The time is now
The time is here
When all is haywire
When all laughs at my puny trying of making things right.

I know, I know
You will say, "Trust me in my child"
But Lord how can I when all I see is doom?
How can I when I have reached the wall?

Lord even when I cant see the dawn
Let me hope for it.
Let me feel the good in my heart
Let it drive me each day.

Lord of course I will trust you.
All I have to do
is look around and count my blessings
And look at the miracles